" And whoever welcomes a little child like this in my name welcomes me." Matt 18:5
Jesus- the most famous adoptee ever:)
Through much thought, discussion, research, and prayers, we have decided to expand our family through the Domestic Infant Adoption Program at Bethany Christian Services. As you can imagine, we are completely thrilled about this and excited to finally be able to tell our family and friends!
Adoption has always been a dream of mine(Chelsie) ever since I was a little girl, watching the Baby Story and Adoption Story shows on TLC.. We were blessed to get pregnant on our own twice, and I love being a mommy. While I was still pregnant with Cambria, our Pediatric Cardiologist informed us that there is a strong genetic factor to Jackson's heart defect, which increases our chances of having another heart baby by as much as 40%! Praise God that Cambria's heart is perfectly healthy, but we decided on tubal ligation at the time of my c-section as a permanent form of birth control. Ever since we dated, James and I both talked about our love of being a part of large families, and our desire to have at least 4 or 5 children ourselves. The more I read and learn about adoption, the more excited I get. This is God's will for our lives, and He really does answer prayers and give us the desires of our heart! Here are some illuminating and interesting points about adoption that I borrowed from a fellow transracial adoptive family's blog:- "According to the Child Welfare Information Gateway, in 1995, there were over 10 million women in the U.S. who had considered adoption. Of those 10 million, only 1.6 million had ever taken steps toward an adoption. However, only 437,000 women had ever adopted. EVER! That’s just 1.3 percent of the original 10 million!
- Compare that to the fact that around 100,000-200,000 domestic children, age newborn-18 need adopting each year. A large number of these children wind up in the state foster care system. Obviously, it is a myth that there are no children available for adoption here in the U.S.
- Furthermore, in some parts of the country, about 50% of newborns placed for adoption are white, with the other 50% consisting of every other race or mixture of races. In other parts of the country, about 50% are African-American, with the other 50% consisting of every other race or mixture of races.
- Based on my research and experience, about 70-80% of people applying to adopt are Caucasian, seeking Caucasian infants. VERY few people are of other races, or are open to any race and older ages. Sadly, there is such a need for adoptive parents for African-American specifically, that many agencies and organizations offer grants and discounts for this race in order to help lower-income people afford adoption.
- Obviously, when you do the numbers, they show a shortage of adoptive parents and an abundance of races other than Caucasian, as well as an abundance of children older than the infant stage.
- It is a sad state of affairs we are in. In fact, with the current economic “crisis,” recent numbers are showing a drastic increase in children of all ages being placed for adoption. Biological parents are hurting, they are scared, and they may desire something different or “better” for their children. They want help. Unfortunately, worldly lies have influenced many to believe that abortion is a quick solution to a “problem.” In fact, between 1 and 2 MILLION abortions are performed every year. And I won’t even begin to get into the statistics of the poor women who wind up suffering emotionally and physically after an abortion.
- We have also learned that, contrary to popular belief, many women who abort truly feel there is no other option and later have many regrets, while most women who place their babies for adoption truly love their babies. However, some women have a desire to finish school, some feel incapable of parenting, some have no support system in place (which any parent needs!), some may have dreams for their child that they feel they cannot provide, some may feel a threat to their life or welfare if they keep the baby, some may already have a child or children and fear they can’t afford or handle another, some may be pregnant by rape, realizing that the baby is an innocent victim as well, and some may be battling an addiction that they just can’t overcome enough to parent. Think of it this way: no matter how messed up her life or priorities may seem to an outsider, she loved her baby enough to give it life! Furthermore, many women love their babies so much that they don’t want the child to be caught in the red tape of the state social system, and therefore choose to use a private individual adoption, private agency, or lawyer, where, in most cases today, the biological mother can actually choose the people/family she desires to parent her baby."
At our intake interview today, our social worker Jamie, informed us that they only have 1 other couple in the entire state of Virginia that's open to a child of any race. So if a birth mother were to walk in the door right then, they'd have to get out-of-state profiles together to show her! Also, of the 3 sample family profiles (the book of family info and pictures they show birth parents) she let us look at, 2 said that they'd except any race BUT African American! That blew my mind and broke my heart..
So we are officially in the Home Study part of the process right now which involves lots and lots of paperwork, Dr's appointments, background checks, and interviews. We should be finished with it in about 2-3 months, and that's when our family profile will be circulated to all of the Bethany offices here in Virginia. Because we are so open to a lot of things, Jamie tells us we should be matched in 6 months or less after that!!! Jackson and Cambria are very excited about our new family member, and we are praying for him/her and the birth mom daily. We are so happy and nervous at the same time, as there are so many more unknowns than being pregnant myself; but we have the peace of knowing we are in God's will and He will bring us the child we are meant to have, just as He did with Jackson and Cambria!
Thank you for loving our family, and for your support and prayers.. they mean everything to us! Also, prayers for the financial aspect would be appreciated. James has been picking up as many long hours at work as possible, and we are hoping to pay with as much cash as we can. We will also be applying for grants and adoption loans once our Home Study is approved, and I am confident it will all be worked out. If anyone has any questions, just let me know in the comment box and I will answer as best I can. and I will leave you with some cute pictures of the kids, enjoying our last few months as a family of 4!
Jackson's favorite toys are all of my cooking utensils.. I can never find a spatula when I need one now:)
On our way to an indoor water park= so fun!!!
My sick girl:( we are all still recovering from feverish cough colds..
